ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
