What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
