Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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