she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
