She said her name was "party"
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
