Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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