shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
