I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
