Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
