And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
