Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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