After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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