guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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