I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
