Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
