problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
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