Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
