is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
