ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
