I cockslap morals
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
