I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
