Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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