none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
