so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
