I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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