i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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