we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
