If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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