break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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