Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
what the fuck happened to the tacos
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
