I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize