There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
