I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
