Do you still have your period?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
