Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
