I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
