I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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