Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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