Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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