So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I deserve this hangover.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
