I wish I could teleport
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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