I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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