Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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