I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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