I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize