we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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