People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Just puked most of my soul out..
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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