How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
whose ass print is on the piano?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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