Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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