Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
